FOMO may be affecting your child. Your FOMO, that is.

I'm a fan of a man named John Sullivan, an author and podcaster who runs an organization called the Changing the Game Project. Not long ago I read a piece he wrote about FOMO ruining kids sports.

He started his thoughts by admitting something very difficult for any parent, let alone one who has coached soccer at every level including professionally: when his kids were involved in sports, he often felt FOMO -- the fear of missing out. "I saw other kids their age who were better players, and wondered “what have I failed to do?” I still see other kids who play only one sport, improving quicker than mine, and worry mine will fall too far behind. I see kids attending additional skill training sessions and summer camps that mine do not. And I worry that my kids may be missing out."

If a man with his background and commitment to keeping youth sports sane experiences FOMO about his kids, what chance do the rest of us have of avoiding it? I certainly can't claim immunity. For the first few years my son played house league baseball, I often felt the same fears.

The answers are simple, it's the execution that's difficult. Because those fears play on your self-image as a parent. After all, if you think your child is "behind", and you can fix that, as a good parent, shouldn't you? If your child falls behind in math, you hire a tutor. Same goes for baseball or softball.

As a guy who makes a living by offering instruction to kids, I think there are plenty of good reasons to pay for a good skills coach for your child. There are also bad reasons, and one of those is because your son or daughter isn't as good a player as others around them.

First of all, each child develops at their own pace. More than that, the reasons your child has for wanting to play a particular sport may be very different than other kids on their team. Your child may just not love the game as much and be as invested in it as his or her friends and teammates. Bottom line? Resist the temptation to compare. No good will come from it.

Also, at the risk that you will think I've taken leave of my senses... your child does not necessarily need to be uber successful to have a great time playing a sport. Let me pose a hypothetical. What if your son was an average or even slightly below average ballplayer, but loved playing so much that, year after year, he just wanted to keep playing. My guess is that most of us would be happy with that.

Sometimes, however, FOMO guides us into making assumptions that our sons and daughters want the same thing that we parents want for them out of their sports experiences. At Bash we occasionally see players who would rather be anywhere else except for taking a hitting lesson. And that's tough on both the player and the coach. I'll bet money that no one asked those kids if they want to take hitting lessons each week.

I urge you to think about your child's youth sports experience and what he or she wants to get out of it. Sports is what they should be doing to have fun, to be a kid. It should not be a test of your parenting.

Let your child guide you, not your own FOMO. After it's all over, you will be able to look back and know that you gave your child the freedom to be a kid, and to enjoy a game they can love for the rest of their lives.

Thoughts? Email me at bashsportsacademy@gmail.com.